snikts: Dark Wolverine #86 & Wolverine: Origins #48

... where we're kinda sick of all the posturing, ADD-addled, obsessive-compulsive behavior being exhibited by Logan and his extended family. i mean, fine, you all hate each other, just kill the guy next to you and be done with it!!! geez.



y'all have claws. y'all don't know what to do with them.


man, this thing is so gay its not happy anymore.


oh, look, who's upset because Crystal Bowersox didn't win this season's American Idol:


and he has more spit than the winner!!!


and when he asks his father why the most talented people don't win:



now back to Logan; it took you this long to do this???


oh, wait, that was just what Logan wanted to do! what he actually does is imprison Romulus in the Darkforce Dimension inside Cloak. ooooooo-kay. but it took you this long to do that too??

by the way, if its dark in there, how come there's light?


oh, look we got a cutter!!



huh. look, Tyrone's the voice of reason. by the way, dude? you're responsible for the X-Men being trapped in Utopia. if you didn't leave, THEY. STILL. WOULD. HAVE. A. GODDAMNED. TELEPORTER. selfish prick.

snaps: Wolverine Origins #44

... where a title like Wolverine Origins get increasingly set in the present, and nothing much about his origins really have come much into fore since Daken and the idiotic Romulus. speaking of Romulus, he's up for lamest villain ever for being a huge drama queen. instead of Logan kicking better ass, he's resorted to recruiting big petulant green aliens for allies and jailbreaking a chick mis-named after a restauant chain, with a snow globe for a head.

who-hoah! hold yer horses right there, pardner! there was a fight but i wouldn't call it "epic".


no, you don't. bet you don't have Jean Grey's number.


let me get this straight: with the superpower-dampeners in effect, shouldn't Logan be screaming in pain right now because his healing factor's not working? or are mutant powers excluded?


the prospect of gay sex stunned the ultra macho Wolverine into a few moments of silence.


that would be like kissing a fishbowl. and no, Dagger is cooking pot roast tonight.


let me ask you some: you had Wolverine dead to rights, you coulda killed him, then you leave but go back to stalking him. you are the worst kind of obsessive fan, Romulus. Glenn Close had nothing on you.

4 > 3 > 2

so that's the much-hyped Romulus!!!

if you believe the hype, this guy is the single most important figure in shaping Wolverine into who he is now (even much more influential than Weapon X and Charley Xavier). he looks much more dangerous than Apocalypse or Mr. Sinister. well, i said looks. he kinda resembles Ra's Al Ghul crossed with Vandal Savage and ... ooppss, wrong company.

and what's his goal again? manipulating Logan's bloodline to do what? create Weapons of Mass Destruction? to do what?

and if he's hell-bent on finding his true heir among all the adamantium-tinged freaks he loves to play with (presumably all dead with the exception of Logan and Daken), does it mean he really can be slain with the Muramasa blade too, because if he's that powerful and no one can take him down, what's the point eh?

by our math, 4 claws are much better than 3, so that leaves X-23 as the low woman on the totem pole (see X-Force #18 for her funny evisceration, on sale now! - Axel Alonso).

even Logan doesn't walk around shirtless. well, maybe around the Westchester mansion grounds in summer, back in the day. and he has a better haircut. i guess, being near immortal, you just give up when your favorite barber keeps croaking every 20 years or so.

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Wolverine: Origins #39