because Batman Inc would sue you, duh.

"I was gonna say 'BatMite', dude!"

forty idiots and a funeral

drive-by readings

Shadowland: Bullseye #1 (Marvel) "Bullseye: Dead On Arrival" John Layman Sean Chen Sandu Florea Guru eFX Joe Caramagna John Christopher Tyler (cover)

what we learned: Bullseye is dead. for now. some writer still has to figure out how to bring him back. actually, his death should resonate a lot more, being a pivotal figure in the Daredevil mythos, but i don't seem to feel the shock waves as a reader. maybe its because death has no meaning anymore in comicbookland.
oh shit moment: did Matt Murdock crack a hint of an honest smile? in his dark duds? when he found Ben Urich's bread crumbs? and while he's thinking of ways to control Hell's Kitchen all the more?
what's next: a one-shot with Shroud doing his Pig Pen thing ... just panels and panels of him walking around Manhattan with that dark dust billowing on his feet.


i hate crazy people, because they have a goddamn excuse.

a backhanded compliment to Gray's Papaya

not that Nathan's will complain ...

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Daredevil: Cage Match one shot

Deadpool, spiders and monkeys, oh my!

with the arrival of Hitman Monkey on the scene, the Marvel Universe is about to be turned upside down. well, at least for Spidey and Deadpool.

in a nutshell, if you missed the simian assassin's origin, suffice it to say he learned from a great killer. combine with natural monkey agility and survival skills, you probably have one of the better assassins in history. and now he's out to wipe out the competition. hey, Wade, look out!!

if this isn't made into a movie, i'm going to stage a protest march. ok, can we have him at least in the 3rd Spider-Man movie after the reboot? or in the Deadpool solo film?

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Deadpool #20

and ..... he's dead.

and this is why it takes too long for the X-Men to eliminate their enemies. longtime loser and '90s hair model/spoiled brat Matsu'o Tsurayaba finally bites the dust, way past his expiry date. and to think Wolverine doesn't want him dead and tortures him every single year for killing his wife Mariko. huh - really?? i didn't see him in this state when he was hassling our mutants back in the '90s. so Wolverine only thought about it thereafter, like when Matsu'o went from B-list to D-list?

same day every year? really? what about that time when he actually became a Hand assassin?


apparently, this is the alternate ending of Edward vs Bella, The Twilight Chronicles


c'mon, Matsu'o, say the "z". you're almost there. Utz! Utz!


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Psylocke #4

life is never fair

in Psylocke #3, we finally learn Matsu'o Tsurayaba's secret - he's become Mason Verger. what, all that Hand money and they didn't even bother to fix you up?? i suggest place a call to 1-800-DAREDEVL.

and who is responsible for this dastardly deed?

Daken gets to chop up Frank Castle, while Wolverine only skewers a former D, now Z list villain. we'd all love to see Logan slice and dice Norman Osborn, but that would be too easy now, wouldn't it, Marvel?

basically, what this shows is that Wolverine may be excellent in killing foot soldiers, run-of-the-mill ninjas and expendable aliens, but not any of the upper-tier supervillains. it took him like a hundred years before he killed Sabretooth. and he even whiffed on Mystique.

not something you'd look into on a Monday

that's it?

Dick is Bats? somehow the journey to get to this point now leaves a bad taste in my mouth.



so the Battle for the Cowl was just one big brawl between the former Robins. what was Jason Todd's point? will Robin still be Tim or Damian? Gotham City is like a cross between 2004-2006 Baghdad and 1990s Mogadishu - they should just relocate the people and wipe it off the map (didn't they try once to boot it out of the US during that earthquake crossover?). what the hell. why. what.

i'm blabbering like an idiot. Bruce, heelllllp!!!!


/somewhere out there, Bruce scrawls on a cave wall: "can't help you. busy hunting food."

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Battle for the Cowl #3

totally batass

witness how totally prepared Batman is. we're awaiting T'Challa's next move.



if you still don't get it, the dude had a backup personality just in case someone destroys his main one. i mean, how crazy is that?

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Batman #679
Grant Morrison/Tony Daniel/Sandu Florea/Guy Major/Randy Gentile

the light is green

World War Hulk sightings:

the scum known as Ant-Man has been swallowed by the Hulk. well, actually Ant-Man wanted to take the Hulk down from within. turns out he can't. so he settles for other extra-curricular activities.

i'm not even gonna think about that Red Zone deodorant in Holku's stomach.

pretty soon, Eric's karma comes back and slaps him upside the head. yaaaaaaaaaaay.

i'm all for Mitch shooting O'Grady right then and there. but there's something compelling about extending this story for awhile. its like watching a dangerous animal go about its business - you have to kill it now but somehow you're fascinated. until it bites you in the ass. its not everyday that you get stories within the Marvel Universe that deal with the people in between - kinda like Frontline but more fun and grating and gleefully annoying all at the same time.

let me ask you: is that General T-Bolt Ross' tongue, or his lower lip is just too protruding?

the respected Dr. Bruce Banner, a milksop? no waaaaaaaaaay. say, General, isn't that your Army being torn to pieces right now?

another old nemesis, General John Stryker (ambitious soldiers probably change their names when they know they can make it to the top - i mean does "Colonel Rudy Gay" or "General Stewie Ottum" sound badass to you?) has put-together, secretly of course, a team of Hulkbusters (a bunch of Gamma-powered nutcases). why? because he knew that the Hulk would be shot into space and would come back soon enough. yeah, sure.

whatever reasons Stryker had then for trying to capture the Hulk (to study him and use the knowledge to heal his cancer-stricken wife Lucy), there's none of them now as Stryker is a fugitive (a rich and connected one, nonetheless) and only his proposition to solve the Hulk problem saves him from a S.H.I.E.L.D. prison.

leading the team is someone with ties to the Hulk as well - the late Glenn Talbot's bro, Brian. and to shock us readers, he's called Grey and he's actually grey (a nod, of course, to the Hulk's very first incarnation). but he looks Mexican to me.

we've been promised by the head honchos during the NYCC that the Gamma Corps are supposed to be really hardcore, badass individuals (which is why they had - cough, cough - tough guy Frank Tieri writing it). we'll see. i want to see dead people, people. dead, i say.

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The Irredeemable Ant-Man #10
Robert Kirkman/Phil Hester
World War Hulk: Gamma Corps #1
Frank Tieri/Carlos Ferreira/Sandu Florea