you happy puppets

drive-by readings

Deadpool Team-Up #890 (Marvel) James Asmus Micah Gunnell Rob Stull John Rauch Jeff Eckleberry Humberto Ramos/Edgar Delgado (cover)

what we learned: insurance salesman Machine Man (ahaha) stakes a claim to Deadpool for all the property damage he's caused through the years (ahahaha). however, same insurance company is currently held hostaged by disenfranchised customer Puppet Master, who has an axe to grind (or clay to mold) because of greedy corporate executives.
oh shit moment: Puppet Master ends up getting tossed outside the window, which eerily mirrors how the damn fat cats think about us common Joes.
what's next: hey, editor: several words that rhyme with Gorilla: Sarsaparilla, Pancho Villa, Umbrella.


yes, Mr. Masters, just like yours.

riders on the storm

drive-by readings

Rawhide Kid: The Sensational Seven #3 (Marvel) Ron Zimmerman Howard Chaykin Edgar Delgado Jeff Eckleberry Mark Brooks (cover)

what we learned: i am not ashamed to say i like this series, fluffy cowboy and all. so we learn who the seventh man is, and he's just a Kid named Billy. Zimmerman evokes the silly comedy of old Westerns in moments where Doc Holliday bitchslaps the punk, and the Earp brothers fighting each other in their jail cell (something's not right there). even better, seven bad guys have been matched against the Sensational Seven. that evokes Avengers vs Squadron Supreme circa 1976. another Avengers tip o' the hat: Matthew Hawkins remembering his Avenger days. good times.
oh shit moment: the opening scene has the jackass (and ugly) Billy throwing his weight around, before Doc puts him in his place.
what's next: slap leather!!!


if there's a Kid Dead, then No-Good Kid sounds better.

basic instincts

drive-by readings

World War Hulks: Spider-Man vs Thor #2 (Marvel) Kieron Gillen Chris Eliopoulos Jorge Molina Paul Pelletier Ronan Cliquet Patrick Scherberger Scott Koblish Edgar Delgado Rachelle Rosenberg Chris Sotomayor Clayton Cowles Barry Kitson/Dave McCaig (variant cover)

what we learned: we learned that the Marvel brain trust is never exempt from capitalizing on mindless spinoffs that do not advance the plot of the main storyline whatsoever and will cook up any excuse for mindless pummeling between their characters. i guess Marvel vs Capcom or Ultimate Alliance is not enough.
oh shit moment: you did not just say the Smithsonian museums are boring. what are these, the flexing of the id? yeah, probably.
what's next: let's just have Hulk and Skaar kill each other once and for all. or make a pure Marvel-characters-only fighting game on all platforms with killer graphics and no plot at all.


sheeeeesh. even for Peter Parker, that's inane.

prissy prissy bang bang

drive-by readings

Rawhide Kid: The Sensational Seven #1 (Marvel) Ron Zimmerman Howard Chaykin Edgar Delgado Jeff Eckleberry John Cassaday (cover)

this is where i make peace with the fact that one of my childhood cowboy friends is a fast-drawing elegant metrosexual. right. breathe deeply. exhale. how ya doin', Kid?


that's just his way of saying he blows. i kid, i kid.

Rawhide Kid saunters into Tombstone, where he discovers the Earp brothers have been kidnapped by an old unfriendly acquaintance named Cristo Pike. most of this he learns from his good gal pal, Annie Oakley, who's probably not as fetching in real life.

does "continental lifestyle pleasures" include eating snails and horses? just asking.

he dresses well, he's a deadeye, he fixes hair, and to top it off, he can quiet an unruly crowd and lay a beating on bullies with the best of them. yeah, he doesn't like the name calling so you's better watch that potty mouth, boy.

with the threat of Pike hanging the Earp brothers, the Kid decides to rustle up a posse to mount a rescue, and one of them fellers is probably below:

hey, did you rape Mockingbird?

actually, its a fun read, and riffing off The Magnificent Seven, this looks to be a nice trip back to the Old West, Marvel-style.

say, Kid, what do you do to keep your face clean and smooth while riding out there?



which reminds me ... i need to get Red Dead Redemption so bad.

snaps: Avengers - The Initiative #34

... where eyes are finally opened, friendships are renewed and broken, and the New Warriors reunite! no, really. and pompous Taskmaster is taken to ...task (hey, wasn't he hired by the good guys once?). the issue focuses mostly on the Initiative guys until the latter part where they switch to Asgard only because we need to see Taskmaster get taken down (or not). and lest we forget that ex-Cap gal pal Diamondback is indeed an Initiative member (but as a spy, natch!), this is the part where she loses it when she sees her blond stud ex alive and well. well, poor Constrictor.

hey, here's a thought: what IF Dwayne wasn't in heaven??


look who's calling the kettle black, Mister Former-D-Lister. (you're still a D-Lister to me, brah)


Cap giving it to the castle grey skull.


Frank can forget about tapping that ass. and Rachel apparently forgot about Agent 13.


so is he gonna go back to being Speedball now? is he? is he? considering he's sort of directly responsible for all of these 7 years ago?

viva Zapata!

drive-by readings

Deadpool Team Up #898 (Marvel) "Bring Me The Head of Mickey Dobbs" Mike Benson Carlo Barberi Juan Vlasco Marte Gracia Joe Sabino Humberto Ramos/Edgard Delgado (cover)

hate to use a cliche, but if you really have to read one book this month, well ... this is it.

ok, that may be too much praise, but very few books keep me really entertained these days, and those that barely do the job, i try to make fun of. am surprised considering Deadpool has turned into the new Wolverine (rivaling him for most appearances in the Marvel U every month), that a revived 'Pool series with the issue number counting down would be a lot more interesting that any regular 'Pool ongoing series.

the #899 opener written by Fred Van Lente was funny, but this second, by Mike Benson, is really hilarious. combining the irreverent hitmen-slash-luchadores the Zapata Brothers (from his solid Moon Knight-in-Mexico run) with immortal-assassin-slash-buffoon Deadpool ... well, the possibilities are endless. Deadpool takes a job off another hitman who tries to whack him - deliver a head to certain people for eight figures (we keep forgetting the 'mercenary' part of 'Pool as he's been a fixture in the Marvel U for awhile now - battling aliens, fighting with Spiderman & the Punisher, hanging with Cable and the X-Men, etc.). the Zapata Brothers take his bounty but run afoul of their subcontractors. 'Pool tracks the Brothers down, and what do you know? turns out they run the Mexican branch of the Deadpool Fans Club! and this only means one thing .... TEAM-UP!

Benson hits nice touches with the smartass Zapata Brothers that resonate with me like iPhone vs Blackberry debates and their musical tastes. (i love Oingo Boingo, and i love the Pet Shop Boys up to circa Behavior, ok? so sue me.) its quite fitting that characters can be created out of modern luchadores (thank you, Jack Black) that cater well to the Facebook and Twitter crowd (and they even talk like them, with the educated Latin American twinge, minus the hellish frequency of the "like" expression and the upward inflection). and the look on their faces when 'Pool reveals that they whacked their idol with a shovel - precious. and the funny lines aren't forced at all and play with the fourth-wall-breaking thing ("i got a Bowen Bust of your head!").

now, now, before Joe Quesada or Dan Buckley reads this (chances: nil and nada, and nil just left town), let's not go crazy and clamor for a Zapata Brothers solo series. that might be a good idea in the short term, but would water down the characters and burn everybody out, especially in the hands of some writer who won't hit the right notes. i prefer to read them from time to time, OR maybe in a consistent team up with Deadpool, since they got the chemistry going already. but if they are gonna do this, can we please have Humberto Ramos doing the interiors too?

girls, girls, girls!

drive-by readings

The Amazing Spider-Man #606 (Marvel) "Long-Term Arrangement" Joe Kelly Mike McKone Andy Lanning Chris Chuckry Joe Caramagna J. Scott Campbell/Edgar Delgado

so much for the Chameleon. over the past few issues, the Spidey Brain Trust thought it best to up the ante in the game of "how much more can we make a lovable loser out of Peter Parker" by bringing back Mary Jane, right smack in the middle of Peter having platonic-bordering-on-something friendships with like half the female cast (the other half is Aunt May, and that's off-limits). and now they throw Felicia Hardy into the mix. last thing i saw of Spidey and Black Cat being a couple was her being shot up and there's him carrying her to the hospital (ah, nostalgia - anybody remember what issue in the '80s that was?). its okay that the Spidey Brain Trust provides overall direction, but the rotating cast of writers and artists (since Brand New Day) kinda makes the whole thing a bit disjointed, y'know?

and wow, if Peter can do splits like that ... look out, Olympics!

drive-by readings: Immortal Weapons #1

Immortal Weapons #1 (Marvel) "The Book of the Cobra"/"Caretakers, Part 1" Jason Aaron Duane Swierczynski Mico Suayan Stefano Gaudiano Roberto De La Torre Khari Evans Victor Olazaba Michael Lark Arturo Lozzi Travel Foreman Nate Piekos Edgar Delgado Matt Hollingsworth Jelena Djurdjevic Jodi Wolff June Chung David Aja (cover)

screw the DC Universe Kobra, or the G.I. Joe Cobra. make mine Fat Cobra! it may or may not make them a bushel of money, but Marvel's Immortal Weapons, a spinoff series of the popular characters from Iron Fist (thanks to Messrs. Brubaker, Fraction and Aja) make for great reading. we can all figure that Fat Cobra has an eating problem, but who knew he had a semi-Forrest Gump streak in life, hanging out with Elvis, fighting side by side with Nick Fury, and siring Skrull children? holy humongous hogs! Fat Cobra has the most star power among the Weapons (save Danny Rand of course), but i hope the others will be fleshed out just as entertainingly.

Iron Fist fans (like me), fear not! a backup story is included in each ish (Caretakers). Danny goes back to his roots trying to save regular folk on a daily basis (nice touch with Misty co-teaching in his dojo). they may not be Heroes for Hire in that sense anymore, but they're "heroes" with a fuller meaning.

tipping points

with a is-he-a-murderer-or-not Jericho inside Nightwing, the latter has to make a decision when the JLA comes a-calling ... and of course, 'Wing's gonna say:


of course, we like to cheer heroes beating up on each other.

speaking of beating, Frank Castle's heart is still cool as a cucumber although Molly Von Richtofen's heart is probably doing calisthenics, and not because she spotted a hottie.

we all await the final chapter where we bury Elite and this Ma Gnucci nonsense once and for all (heh! snort!)