Showing posts with label Black Canary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Black Canary. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

clipped wings

drive-by readings

Birds of Prey #24 (DC)
"Endrun Part 4: Impact Fracture"
Gail Simone
Ed Benes/Adriana Melo
J.P. Mayer
Nei Ruffino
Steve Wands
Alina Urusov (cover)
Ryan Sook/Joel Gomez/Fernando Pasarin/Randy Mayor/Carrie Strachan (variant cover)

what we learned: just when we thought the Birds were down, they get back into the game. the White Canary is the sister of 12 brothers Dinah bitchslapped years ago, and now their sister is here to reclaim the family honor. Dove finds the mettle to introduce her fist to Penguin, who's already counting his birds before the eggs have even hatched. meanwhile, Creote and Savant attempt to push Barb off the edge, but its actually Savant who wants to die. and its all been a gay thing. oi.
oh shit moment: can we have Yuen Wo-Ping coordinate the fight scenes between Black and White Canaries? awesome!
what's next: what, Shiva framed Dinah?


Michael Phelps would be proud.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

you hit like a girl! #15

Dinah Lance has been an important DC character for so long. the Black Canary role has been passed from her mother to her (they actually had to split the original character into two!), and the modern era has made Dinah a pillar of feminine ideals and strength.

Dinah has led the Justice League and the Birds of Prey, two of the best villain-stomping superteams in the DCU. i actually prefer her run in Birds of Prey, as they were like the Danger Girls with more brains and all of the sass and sexayness.

i mean, seriously, if you have less than two X chromosomes, you better watch your step around Dinah. especially if you've been previously married to her (the point being "previous" as it means you did something shitty and she divorced you and years later, you're still acting shitty).


Dinah would also make a great debt collector if this crimefighting thing didn't pan out (y'know, if there ever was peace on earth). below is what would happen to those who apply for those 0% loans but skipped town right after they got the money.


also, she could be a great dentist (at least when it comes to tooth extraction), providing cheap services to those who can't afford insurance (here's a big eff you to AIG).


but back to crimefighting. criminals would always be doing something stupid (that's why they are criminals; some are just stupider than others).

let's take for example, this bow-wielding, Wolverine-haired jackass named Merlyn, who dared kidnap Dinah's adopted daughter, to ultimately control the League of Assassins. that's a no-no.


if you're fighting with a bow and arrow, it probably makes sense not to go into hand to hand combat ...


... since its possible you can lose both your arms, and you'll be left with spitting at the enemy.


assuming you can get the spit out before getting kicked in the mouf.


ahh, archers. they never learn. why, Ollie Queen (a.k.a. Green Arrow) should know this, of all people, and he could've warned Merlyn of what could happen. but ... naaaaahhh. they kinda hate each other.

Ollie knows what could happen, because he's been on the receiving end many, many times.


he knows he's gonna get whipped and he still does it. i mean, we never did see much what happened in the past when he was still this philandering ladies' man. whooooh. who knows how many times these two broke up? (and what bones were broken)


Dinah still ends up marrying Ollie, but only because he likes the pain. i kid, i kid.

oh, yeah, and never ever tell her that she hits like a girl. or tell her to shut up. ever.


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Black Canary limited series (2007)

Friday, October 12, 2007

Queen held by bitches, film at 11

following the death (ho-hum) of Green Arrow, a.k.a. Oliver Queen, right in his honeymoon night with Black Canary (a.k.a. Dinah Lance), we find the grieving widow letting off some steam for non-consummation (among other things - yes, she actually had to kill him ... go read the miniseries, dammit).


but since this is "superhero death" we're talking about, no one accepts death anymore, they try to resurrect anyone who dies. i mean, Ra's Al-Ghul could go straight and make a fortune by selling off his Lazarus Pits. and Vandal Savage could be his technical consultant. hellooooooo??? is anyone reading this?


so Batman believes Dinah that the dead body isn't Oliver's, and so he and Dr. Mid-Nite go try to make their CSI dreams come true.


jackpot! it's not Oliver (like fans didn't know that all along!) - its some shapeshifting schmuck named Everyman (oh that schmuck!). and Dinah thinks she knows who has Oliver. yes, its those bitches who declared war against the U.S. last month, and who took down the phallic symbol that is the Washington Monument. how dare they! and how dare they prevent Oliver from consummating his marriage to Dinah!



er ... Wonder Woman? why are your people being like this? did their "time of the month" suddenly become "time of the year"? what the hell, girl??


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Green Arrow & Black Canary #1

Saturday, August 18, 2007

love rules!



he may be a selfish jerk (reminds me of me) ... but Ollie Queen gets the babe!


(and Merlyn gets 2 broken arms ... hooooohaaaaaa!)

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Black Canary #4
Tony Bedard/Paulo Siqueira/Joe Prado/Amilton Santos