joke's on them

drive-by readings

Batman & Robin #14 (DC) "Batman and Robin Must Die! Part 2: The Triumph of Death" Grant Morrison Frazer Irving Pat Brosseau Frank Quitely (cover)

what we learned: not one to be overshadowed or upstaged, the Joker wants to get back at the Black Glove/Thomas Wayne/Dr. Hurt/whatever the shit's calling himself these days. to this end, he has Batman and Robin (and the Commish Gordon) as chess pieces, and Gotham City and its residents as collateral damage. wheeeeeeeeee!
oh shit moment: Damian getting himself captured by the Joker. that'll work wonders with his confidence.
what's next: i want the current Dynamic Duo get out of this without the Bat family getting involved. ok, maybe Alfred.


after years of rejection, Miss Piggy finally snapped.

london culling

drive-by readings

Red Hood: The Lost Days #4 (DC) "Higher Learning" Judd Winick Jeremy Haun Brian Reber Pat Brosseau Billy Tucci (cover)

what we learned: London's Russian mob wants to get the heat off them by staging a bombing that would lay the blame on Arab terrorists. with Jason Todd learning from the bombmaker himself, he's in the best position to stop the carnage before it even begins.
oh shit moment: Talia notices that all his teachers end up conveniently dead (with reason). she also informs him that he's been replaced as the Boy Wonder.
what's next: did Jason ever want to reclaim the mantle of Robin?


its your fault - if you just disconnected that 1-800 number...

the bitches of vegas

drive-by readings

Zatanna #4 (DC) "Playing With Fire" Paul Dini Chad Hardin Wayne Faucher Pat Brosseau John Kalisz/Lovern Kindzierski Stephane Roux (cover) Brian Bolland (variant cover)

what we learned: Zee, aside from being a Vegas showgirl, has to do part-time asskicking of troublemakers like the Royal Flush Gang (these mooks have no other M.O. except rob casinos? why not hit the Indian ones? there are no superheroes there!). problem is her current (flirty) employer looks like a dealmaker with the devil Mammon, and looks younger than he really is. Mammon meanwhile, is in the habit of employing red-hot witches masquerading as 90-year old bitches.
oh shit moment: its 2010 and Zatanna still has no defense against mouth attacks, and she can't make a spell without talking?
what's next: Zee needs a healing factor. pronto.


i've burned my tongue before but this is ridiculous.

bam!

drive-by readings

Red Hood: The Lost Days #3 (DC) "School" Judd Winick Jeremy Haun Brian Reber Pat Brosseau Billy Tucci (cover)

what we learned: the resurrected Jason Todd learns the killing arts under Egon, a German ne'er-do-well (actually he did, until he met Jason). the former Robin still has a semblance of a conscience and deals justice in his own way. surprisingly, he's even-tempered in here. must be the Lazarus Pit. or i thought it drove you crazy eventually.
oh shit moment: i will be wary of sports energy drinks from now on. especially since i am an evil blogger who writes non-funny things about fictional characters.
what's next: what's Talia's endgame?


well, it did work for Darth Vader ...

el kryptonians

drive-by readings

Superman: The Last Family of Krypton #1 (DC) "The Last Family of Krypton, Part One/Part Two" Cary Bates Renato Arlem Allen Passalaqua Pat Brosseau Felipe Massafera (cover)

what we learned: not sure if this should have just been released as a one standalone volume trade, but money talks, thus we have a three-parter. but i like it: Kal-El and his parents crash-land in Metropolis and after a tense confrontation, manage to convince us Earthmen that they want to make this their new home. so instead of just a Superman, we get a Super-family. eventually, with the demands of the new world weighing down on them as miracle workers, they decide to have Kal be raised by a set of worthy Earth parents (choices include legendary DC Editor Julius Schwartz and Dr. Thomas "I Could Be A Murderer or A Saint, Am Not Sure Yet" Wayne), settling for - ta-dah! - Jonathan and Martha Kent. against Jor-El's wishes, Kal grows up to be Clark Kent, mild-mannered student with a secret.
oh shit moment: not to sound crass, but Renato Arlem draws a mean Lara El with a damn fine booty. sorry.
what's next: twin siblings, Lex Luthor, and would B(rainiac) turn into a villain?


that invention would have made Luthor a billionaire.

look out, Teen Titans, you're next!

countdown for Jaime Reyes' funeral, in three, two ...

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Justice League: Generation Lost #2

NY governor Paterson is not happy...

... bars Damage from entering NY state. "we do not need heroes of his kind here. before any of our cities becomes another Atlanta, i hereby declare Damage henceforth barred from entering the state of New York."



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JSA All-Stars #6

snaps: Batman & Robin #10

... where this title picks up steam again since its first 4 issues. is Bruce Wayne really alive? ("yes.") will Damian stay on as Robin? ("cannot predict now.") will Talia succeed in her schemes? ("don't count on it.") is Thomas Wayne the Devil? ("reply hazy, try again.") how will this all end? ("better not tell you now.")

move over, Tim Geithner; there's a new genius in town!


but, but ... the wifi is so slooooooow. sir.


Teen Titans? he'd be lucky to be accepted in Young Justice!


a-ha! the next clue is in Rihanna's birthplace!


this is for taking my father's mantle, you circus oaf!

you hit like a girl #20

hell, why not make it a three for three?




if you look closely, Kara has her eyes open. and she's slightly smiling. i'd say she's checking out the package, but that's just me.


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Magog #6

you hit like a girl #19

VALENTINE'S DAY EDITION



yes, yes, i know
two straight PGs in a row
but if you want it

snaps: JSA All Stars #2

... where a creepy stalker named Johnny Sorrow is seemingly responsible for Courtney's kidnapping. not sure how old Johnny is, but he sure dresses like an old pervert.

not Lady Shiva, not Dagger ... Shiv.


at least she has a better sense of humor than Jocasta. or Danger. or Plato.


oh yeah? well, you're not worthy of my Demonicats!! or my Accursedogs!!!


oi! George Lucas just speed-dialed his lawyer.


define "love".

snaps: JSA All Stars #1

... where apparently Ronald Reagan lost the Cold War, and someone luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuvs StarGirl so much he kidnaps her. man, she's still a kid!! you are so deaaaaaad!! and it reads like Fables because we get a lot of torn clothing off a female (well, its just PG, but hey.....)

1) Putin? Vladimir Putin, is that you?


2) apparently, one of the JSA members is some sort of Disney mascot. (hey! wrong company! rrrrrrraaaawwwwrrrrrr!)


3) geeez. then we should be really scared of the "extraordinary staff"!


4) well, pardon me for being illiterate!!!!


5) hey, Disney mascot!! whatchu lookin' at??

pinks and reds

drive-by readings

Batman & Robin #5 (DC) "Revenge of the Red Hood, Part Two: Scarlet" Grant Morrison Philip Tan Jonathan Glapion Alex Sinclair Patrick Brosseau Frank Quitely (variant cover)

now this is more like it. Gotham is about to explode (like when was it not in that state?) - from gang wars and vigilantes. this is the issue where the Red Hood and his new partner, Scarlet, humiliate the new Batman & Robin. is it really Jason Todd under that red bucket? he looks more like another DC character who's name escapes me (think ... red hair, white streak ... ahhh shit, when you get old ...).

my kudos to Grant Morrison for the Eduardo Flamingo character ("Buffalo Bill"?) ... a sicko who skins and eats people's faces ... and is the premiere assassin for a drug cartel, and doesn't shirk away from the color pink. whooooooooooooo! he's like the sixth Village person!

but what i wanna see is, how the Hood leaves the discombobulated duo (really? Bruce wouldn't be taken down like that, would he?) in a situation where they might not get away "...with their dignity intact." would they be in their wedgied underwear and masks only? were they left in compromising positions and TMZ paparazzo are on the way? i wanna know!!

with Alex Sinclair doing the colors, Philip Tan's artwork is getting its sea legs (still some Kubert in there though). let's see if that applies to this story arc and beyond.

drive-by readings: Batman & Robin #3

Batman and Robin #3 (DC) "The Circus of Strange" Grant Morrison Frank Quitely Alex Sinclair Pat Brosseau Tony Daniel (variant cover)

if Christopher Nolan was somehow unavailable to make the next Batman movie, can we go back in time, pluck the '90s Quentin Tarantino (with '90s Robert Rodriguez) and get them to helm the thing based on Batman & Robin? because this is how the book plays out. the two leads cut a glorious figure, Gotham's protectors reborn to save them from the crazies. what makes Damian, the new Robin, both annoying and fun to read, is that he has balls 3x the size of his dad's. wonder what happens when Bruce finally comes back from his unintentional exile. as for Dick Grayson, how long before he breaks out laughing in front of Commissioner Gordon and reveals his identity? i mean, its bound to happen, right? right??

i'll bite: who's this presumably, new Red Hood? who's watching Alfred? will that girl survivor of Pyg's experiments haunt Damian for not saving her? are we gonna see the Joker anytime soon? when did the Batmobile suddenly become a right-hand drive vehicle?

the universal accolades are flowing in, and Batman R.I.P. is quickly disappearing over the horizon. suddenly, i don't long for Bruce Wayne coming back at all. and that's probably the highest compliment i can give Grant Morrison.

drive-by readings: JSA vs. Kobra #2

JSA vs Kobra #2 (DC) "Engines of Faith, Part 2: Strange Days" Eric Trautmann Don Kramer Michael Babinski Pat Brosseau Art Lyon Gene Ha (cover)

i like it when the requisite superhero team gets confounded at every turn by their enemies. it's no fun if they figure out the plot and smash the villains easily. the early-Morrison JLA epitomized these thriller rides. now the Justice Society, a collection of the smartest and most powerful heroes in the DCU, is playing catch-up to a resurgent Kobra, who's determined more than ever to bring about the Apocalypse and makes Al Qaeda look like amateurs. well, the glaring difference is that with Kobra, terrorism is their religion. they also seem to know how to deal with metahumans, as evidenced by decoying them to lock up S.T.A.R. Labs, bombing other places while taking the real prize inside LexCorp offices. this fight is far from over. i guess Power Girl heaving her chest doesn't really work as a distraction anymore. except for me.

drive-by readings: Batman & Robin #2

Batman and Robin #2 (DC) "The Circus of Strange" Grant Morrison Frank Quitely Alex Sinclair Pat Brosseau Andy Kubert (variant cover)

"didn't they used to be taller?" a cop asks Commish Gordon early in this issue. one of the so many little nuances (circus slang, circus freak villains, referencing Bludhaven) that Grant Morrison adds to the emerging panorama of a new Batman and Robin trying to put a semblance of normality to their current upside-down world. as if Dick Grayson didn't have enough to worry about playing Batman, he has the additional headache of babysitting a headstrong Damian, son of Bruce via Talia, whose blatant disrespect of Dick has him ending up in the clutches of the Pig. this seems to be Morrison and Frank Quitely's version of All-Star Batman and Robin (heh), and just like their Superman take, this one promises to be a great ride - and delivers.

drive-by readings: JSA vs Kobra #1

JSA vs Kobra #1 (DC) "Engines of Faith, Part 1: Bad Religion" Eric Trautmann Don Kramer Michael Babinski Pat Brosseau Art Lyon Gene Ha (cover)

so this time, the JSA wants to bring down the vicious terrorist organization led by Cobra Commander ... whoops, wrong Cobra. foreshadowed in the Faces of Evil gimmick (the Kobra issue was actually one of the more interesting ones), Kobra comes back from a sabbatical and ready to take their place as the eminent terrorist organization in the world. screw Al Qaeda and that Cobra. this Kobra is upping the body count.

a suicide bomber nearly takes out Mr. Terrific, despondent as he is with his personal issues. i like the fact that his role in Checkmate comes back to bite him, as some shady arms dealers operate with Checkmate's blessings (including post-hynotic commands) in hopes of catching bigger fish. of course, this does not make Powergirl happy. but that could be a good thing, because when she's mad, she breathes heavily and in a heaving manner, and - ah forget it. anyway, you know how hard is it to deal with religious zealots, and the Society will have their hands full on this one. and oh, welcome back, Don Kramer.

the joke never gets old

cliffhanger of the week!



the Joker vs. Barbara Gordon ... one more time!

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Birds of Prey #22

hellboy loves pancakes

in honor of such pancake passion, some Orlando natives are hosting a gallery of sorts.


go watch Hellboy II today, or i'll sic the Golden Army after you!

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Hellboy: The Right Hand of Doom
Mike Mignola/Dave Stewart/Pat Brosseau