Warriors Three Reboot

So this week was a triple shot espresso courtesy of Marvel. First, they gave us ...

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Oh wait, that's not the female Thor they were rolling out soon. So apparently, Thor (the Thor we all know and love, that lout) will become unworthy of Mjolnir, and thus another hammer-bearer is needed. Apparently also, Beta Ray Bill was not answering his phone.

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All bets are on the recently-acquired comic character/property Angela as the new Goddess of Thunder (what if it was Sif all along?). And although they say she "... isn't a temporary female substitute", how many issues or months would you bet before Thor Odinson regains the hammer? I'll wager less than 3 years, for one big crossover again.

Not too surprising is the ascension of Sam Wilson as the new (albeit temporary, i dare you challenge me) Captain America. I was thinking they would find a cure for Steve Rogers' dilemma in time, but I guess this was one of those insidious long-term plans concocted during one of those Marvel retreats. And why not? Marvel's batting average has been on the rise in the last 14 years.

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Lastly, we are going to have an Iron Man that's "... hard to root for." Yes, the return of Drunk Tony!! Oh, wait, its going to be a Superior Iron Man. Hubris will be the norm, as Tony apparently continues the legacy of Steve Jobs (in more ways than one) and kind of forces his vision on the world (or in this case, San Francisco) because he knows he's right. You know he's always right. He may have gone too far with his Illuminati machinations, but .... you know he's right. 

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October can't be too far away. Enough time to grab the popcorn eh?

Wolverine and Magneto will never be friends

adamantium-pulling and stabby-stabbing are not the easiest of faults to forgive.


just to remind you of the bigger picture here, you may be looking at the next member of the Uncanny X-Force.

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X-Force #9
story A-
art B 

blacker ops

drive-by readings

Uncanny X-Force #1 (Marvel) "The Apocalypse Solution, Chapter One" Rick Remender Jerome Opeña Dean White Cory Petit Esad Ribic (cover) Clayton Crain/Rob Liefeld/J. Scott Campbell/Marko Djurdjevic (variants)

what we learned: X-Force just won't die. and though the previous hype for this new incarnation came across as cheesy, Rick Remender's take is fresh and his choice of characters and characterizations are on the money. the new team follows the money trail to a resurrected Apocalypse, and Archangel himself has made the decision to clearly kill the S.O.B. its also refreshing to see someone use Deadpool for his talents as a coldblooded wisecracking skilled killer that he is, and not simply as the premiere wisecracking raconteur of the MU. this is clearly the best work of Jerome Opeña's burgeoning career.
oh shit moment: gone are the days of simply killing human footsoldiers of the anti-mutant forces. Remender ups the ante and puts our heroes in real harm's way. i don't expect this original team to be still intact at the end (you could say the same thing about the past incarnations, but its probably the vibe of this new team).
what's next: the best time to kill Apocalypse is while he's a child.


no one explains how Warren lies down on his back.

Bruce Wayne is gonna sue

... for swiping his interior designer, bitches!!!

by the way, is there a poor, destitute X-Man? if so, Utopia provides all the benefits and freebies in life, no? including premium health care (thank God for Elixir!!).

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Wolverine: Road to Hell one-shot

pulped fiction

drive-by readings

Franken-Castle #19 (Marvel) "Punishment Chapter 2" Rick Remender Tony Moore Dan Brown Joe Caramagna Simone Bianchi/Simone Peruzzi (cover)

what we learned: Frank Castle and Daken - the rematch! Remender goes full circle after having Daken make sushi out of Frank, and this time, Wolverine's badass kid gets the short end of the stick ... until Papa shows up.
oh shit moment: i think Frank took a lot more punishment back in the The List, but there's still a bunch of cringe-inducing moments here that runs like a "Can You Top This?" contest and fanboys going "whoooaaaaa!" on every turn.
what's next: father and son versus a Frankencastle monstaaaa!!


aw, Logan, you spoilsport. booooooooo.

the abyss gazed back

drive-by readings

Punisher #14 (Marvel) Rick Remender Dan Brereton Tony Moore Dan Brown Joe Caramagna Mike McKone/Morry Hollowell (cover) hey, did i miss something? suddenly Frank's computer geek friend is back on the scene. no, i don't mean Micro. anyhoo, Henry's magic touch with the keyboard and the internet (and his librarian-schmoozing skills probably) serves them well as we find out who the boss of these monster hunters are. turns out its one Robert Hellsgaard (that figures!), monster victim circa 1898 and unfairly imprisoned for mercy killing. defeated by Dracula himself and sent to Limbo, now he's managed to beat time inside an armor of his own design (hey, Tony Stark, sounds like something you'd be interested in - if you haven't invented it already). brought back by monster-obsessed Japs (yay, shall we see the origins of tentacle sex here too?), Hellsgaard becomes too much of a guiding light and they expanded their scopt to include anyone doesn't look human (probably except shapeshifters, whom they can't detect). which brings us to the here and now. and oh, that Bloodstone thing? that may be the only thing that would extend Hellsgaard's life. and now, Frank's ready to take it back. by the way, this may be the only book that uses the term "technological viagra". bravo, Mr. Remender.

snaps: Punisher #11

thoughts on FrankenCastle, episode 1.


1) the Japanese are just insane. i mean, really. funny insane.


2) how did the Dormammu end up on the side of benevolent monsters? (i kid, i kid)


3) FRANK IS RIGHT!!!!


4) well, HIS name is Jack Russell, innit??


5) Peter Parker must be smarting at the sight of these Goblin Gliders in wide use.

i'm not yet totally swayed by this new direction for the Punisher, despite some quarters praising it for its fresh and alternative take. something's off. or i just need to wean myself off sucking on Garth Ennis' teats. ahhh, shit, now that image is gonna stick with me for the rest of the day. dammit.

chopped

drive-by readings

Dark Reign - The List: Punisher one shot (Marvel) "A Good Lie" Rick Remender John Romita Jr Klaus Janson Dean White Joe Caramagna

just when we thought Norman Osborn couldn't make good with anything with his list, he comes roaring back with a big win. yes, i know, the Internet is abuzz with this issue, and for good measure.

after failing to get the Punisher (yeah, its the insistent itch in your ass that gets you) via The Hood, Osborn takes command to hunt Frank down with all the might of H.A.M.M.E.R. behind him, and taking along Daken for good measure. we know among all the Marvel heroes, the Punisher was the most vulnerable, as he really doesn't have any powers. he's not Batman-class, but he's been smart enough to survive all these years. he even offed the whole Marvel Universe, if certain tomes are to be believed.

and for all his bravado and smarts, eventually the Reaper comes to collect and Frank has to pay. i guess i wasn't expecting it - or maybe i wasn't just reading the advance buzz. that's ok, i like it that way. surprise me, comics. once in a while.

and though i can find faults in the great JRJr's work, roping him and Janson in for this piece was genius. i thought i was reading a Kick-Ass issue! you know, with all that blood and gore. i've also been slowly taking into Rick Remender's work - not sure if he feels like Howard Chaykin at times but with more immediacy. and no, am not dissing Chaykin.

so where do we go from here? apparently, the next story arc involves something with the words "Franken-Castle". Halloween gimmick or no? by the way, how does the Man Thing (one of Marvel's best horror characters) get involved in this when he was divided in two by Ares recently? in what issue did he "volt back in"?

it's a time-honored tradition to break down heroes before building them up again. over the past few years, we've seen this happen to Captain America, Thor, Hawkeye (though just don't ask me how he got resurrected. just ... don't.), Scarlet Witch (no, don't ask me about her either), Iron Man (ongoing) and now Frank Castle, our beloved ass-kicking street vigilante playing way above his league. i just hope it doesn't turn out like last time, when he got deployed to fight demons. hoooooo boy.

616: Where You Don't Need Insurance

indeed. i mean, even if people-who-had-their-heads-blown-off like Microchip can even come back to life, courtesy of resident demons, what's there to be afraid of?

you just need a schtick, a gimmick that's useful to someone.

coming back soon: Steve Rogers.

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Punisher #4

but then again where's the fun in that?

if you gave me a comic with the following cover: (hello, Papa John Romita?)


and knowing what we know about Dark Reign, the ascension of Norman Osborn, and the raison d'etre of the Punisher ...

we should expect that, by the end of this book (which they conveniently numbered as a starter issue), Frank Castle should blow this .90 caliber pezzonovante away.

right?

let me quote as you can barely read the text below:
"some enemies you charge head on ... others you shoot through the head with a high powered Skrull sniper rifle from four miles away."


so, at this point, i stopped ... and posted this on the blog.


do we get a payoff?


do we?


update (10PM):
"Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!"
- Brian Bendis/Joe Quesada/Rick Remender/the rest of the Marvel editorial staff