under the sea

drive-by readings

Curse of the Mutants: Namor #1 (Marvel) "Royal Blood: Part One" Stuart Moore Ariel Olivetti Joe Caramagna Jae Lee/June Chung (cover) Joe Quesada/Danny Miki/Richard Isanove (variant cover)

what we learned: in order to combat the rise of the vampires, Atlantean royal douche and current X-Man Namor swims to the depths to find the Aqueos - the age old underwater vampires who may have the head of Dracula (which they need to revive the vampire king, and let him go apeshit on those who whacked him and took his throne). not an easy task, as his own regiment guarding the abandoned Atlantis was decimated, and his only allies at the moments are the Tridents, who look down upon him as nothing but an errand boy for the humans. also, its nice to see Jae Lee come back and do the covers.
oh shit moment: ever been surrounded by fish? how about vampire fish? or vampire mermen?
what's next: the Aqueos just passed a resolution to declare war against Namor and his allies. fish fight! fish fight!


for a few seconds there, Namor considered the woman's advances. you know he did.

snaps: Hercules - Fall of an Avenger

... where Herc's old pals in the Avengers, the Champions, and the Lady Friends of the Prince of Power gather to mourn him. tales are told, glasses are raised, and tears are shed. but what we really want to know is, what the hell is the Elven Tickler??

look! Wolverine's drinking invisible mead!!


ok, that was Northstar right? but on the cover, it shows Pietro?


hey, hey, hey, who's the Asian around here?!? Amadeus, he's mocking you!


dammit, show us the Elven Tickler!!!


Amadeus has a message for the six people ahead of him on the World's Smartest List.

drive-by readings: Immortal Iron Fist #27

Immortal Iron Fist #27 (Marvel) "The Fall of the House of Rand" Duane Swierczynski Travel Foreman David Lapham Timothy Green Juan Doe Javier Rodriguez Nate Piekos Kaare Andrews (cover) Ariel Olivetti (variant cover)

i'm not sure who the best rich dude playing superhero in the 616 universe is: Tony Stark or Daniel Rand. between the two of them, they should've solved cancer, AIDS and the Israel/Palestine question by now. instead they've been distracted saving us from bigger world-beaters (true) time and time again, and now they've both been stripped of their companies. Danny still has his secret ID though, and despite the opportunity to do so, his list of conquests is modest, definitely not in Tony's league, and unlike Tony, he's ready to take the next step as a responsible human being. wait, Tony Stark just sent a text message saying he too, will settle down as soon as he takes care of that Green Goblin maniac running the USA.

back to Danny: his recent adventures have left his company vulnerable and as a result, his net worth has shrunk to Vern Troyer proportions. i would have preferred that Swierczynski painted a few more details as to the tumbling of Rand Inc., but that might be a boring exercise to some. i'm sure the destruction of his building (no insurance?) would qualify as a huge event and should be referenced in other Marvel books. i also liked the neat interspersing of flashbacks of an 8-year old Danny coming to grips with defining a relationship with his dad, building up to this point when he'd be in the same shoes. Luke Cage provides the support as a best friend would, and this is one of the enduring friendships in the Marvel Universe i'd never want to be broken, harking back from their Power Man/Iron Fist days.

as if i didn't like this issue enough, this is where i learned that they're gonna be issuing out Immortal Weapons one-shots for each of Danny's new pals (starting with Fat Cobra). excuse me because i need to change my pants.

drive-by readings 021409

Cable #11 "Wasteland Blues" Duane Swierczynski Ariel Olivetti Jamie McKelvie GuruFx Joe Caramagna

This series gets more depressing as we go along. Cable's broken time machine can only keep jumping into the future, and that future progressively gets bleaker and bleaker. seriously, i needed to eat some chocolate after reading this. or play some Viva Pinata. anyway, Hope (the baby now grown up a bit) deserves a lot better than piggybacking with Nathan (and without chocolate!) to the future that contradicts her name (i'm sure Duane has a plan. right, Duane?). she also deserves not to be drawn like a seven year old with an adult head. thankfully, Jamie McKelvie restores some order in that regard.

Wolverine/Power Pack #4 (of 4) "Alex Power: Master Ninja" Marc Sumerak Gurihiru Dave Sharpe

the Power family mosey over to Japan, because Alex has been chosen to be contestant on a Japanese gameshow "Ninja Master". talk about exciting. and silly. of course, since the title of this book says so, they end up running conveniently into Wolverine (again), who's - guess what - fighting ninjas. the battle provides Wolverine to dispense ol' grampa wisdom to the kids, which in turn Alex uses to win the Ninja Master competition. at least in the eyes of his family. always a fun read, i hope there'll be more Power Packs coming our way soon.

Adventure Comics #0 "The Legion of Super Heroes"/"Origins and Omens" Otto Binder Al Plastino Geoff Johns Francis Manapul Swands Brian Buccellato

reprinting the now-classic (and also somewhat corny) Adventure Comics #247, where Superboy first meets the Legion, the rebooted series, ostensibly starring the Legion of Super Heroes, leads off with a #0 and contains a backup story by DC superwriter Geoff Johns. in the former, Superboy is recruited by the Legion and made to pass a series of tests. take note that they went back to the past to recruit him and he travelled back with them. they should loan Cable a time machine! so, back to future: Superboy only fails because there were other emergencies that delayed him, and thus he's rejected and subjected to jokes. it turns out they were just joshing him and he actually made the cut. this tells us that in the future, jerks will still abound and won't be eliminated in the evolving gene pool. of course, i was more interested in the backup story, where Luthor uses Brainiac to get out of prison. operating with that assumption proves disastrous, as Brainiac has other plans and forces Luthor to work for him. oh, and did i mention a dead Super -being might be involved?

buggy

cliffhanger of the week!


its always a cliffhanger to have man-sized roaches chasing you at the end of the show.

eeewww. this is almost as nasty as The Exterminators.

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Cable #8

tiny toons

The Irredeemable Ant-Man
Robert Kirkman/Phil Hester/Ande Parks
Marvel


i don't know what rock Robert Kirkman crawled out under from, but i hope there's more like him underneath that rock (the answer: it's one of the U.S. states called "Kentucky").

with an impressive (short but growing) list of works, some i have read (Marvel Zombies, the uproarious and mos def offensive Battle Pope) and some yet-to-be (Invincible), Kirkman's career is on the upswing. not bad for a parody writer.

his comedic touch opened a few doors, and one of his latest works, the Irredeemable Ant-Man, is one worth walking inside.

spinning off from the ongoing Marvel multi-crossover series Civil War, the new Ant-Man makes his first appearance sitting on a rooftop eating some crumbs while our heroes are slugging it out on the streets below.


backstory #1: the Ant-Man character has always been Henry Pym. a second Ant-Man, Scott Lang, was killed in battle in a previous storyline Avengers Disassembled. currently, Pym has taken on the Yellowjacket persona, and was tasked to build a new Ant-Man suit for S.H.I.E.L.D. (that's the mouthful Strategic Hazard Intervention, Espionage and Logistics Directorate, Marvel's own fictional superspy agency). S.H.I.E.L.D. has this supercool Helicarrier (think oversized aircraft carrier, but flying) where they work, eat and protect the world.

the tale begins when two S.H.I.E.L.D. rookies, Eric O'Grady and Chris McCarthy are ordered by their supervisor, Mitch Carson, to guard Pym's lab. pressured by the vague scope of their assignment, Eric accidentally knocks out Pym and then the two fool around with the prototype Ant-Man suit. Chris wears the suit and accidentally shrinks. Eric runs away. despite being BFFs, Eric is of questionable character, but Chris sticks by him just the same.


Chris tries to figure out how the suit works and in between crawling through vents, trying to find something to eat ...

where's the chianti?

... and running (the HeliCarrier gets attacked by supervillains) ...


... and fighting ... (or a semblance thereof) ...


... he accidentally witnesses Eric stabbing him in the back. Veronica, a coworker Eric has the hots for, is actually dating Chris. Eric doesn't take this like a man, and takes advantage of every opening he can find to grab Veronica.


oh the lies we tell ...

devastated, Chris makes his way back to their quarters, and the cowardly Eric attacks him with deadly footwear.


as this happens, the attack is still going on, and the two have to abandon their hiding place. Eric then gets Chris killed when he intentionally beats him to the door.

that's why you're always required to wear a helmet

you know where this is going, don't you? Eric takes the Ant-Man suit and thus becomes the headliner of this title.

with a bunch of well-crafted lies, Eric takes Chris' body back to his parents, along with Veronica, and even almost gets her in the sack - at Chris' funeral, no less (thank goodness for common sense!).


taking the suit out for test spins, the slimeball manages to meet a girl, Beth, whom he saves from a mugging, and his one-track mind starts shifting into gear.

"i just ... tee hee ... peed in it."


the jackass even thinks he can cop a free meal, and other freebies, just for his one act of 'kindness'.



as the series progresses, it becomes clear that Eric O'Grady is the poster boy for dastardly behavior. he does a few good deeds along the way, but only with the intent to gain something more in return. and it won't be surprising that he'd sell even his own parents to get what he wants. too bad he doesn't have parents. ok, he'd sell Chris' parents.

it really sucks when your company doesn't have a dental plan

not getting anywhere with Veronica, Eric decides to "live" with Beth, and enjoys the "fringe benefits" (this has probably been a Kirkman fantasy come true).

to see the whole caboodle ... buy the book, dammit!

Eric better not rest on his laurels, 'cause his old supervisor Mitch is looking for him.

a flying car! what will they think of next?

Kirkman has something going on here, providing a new spin to the anti-hero concept. Hester's semi-cartoony art reminds me of Pasqual Ferry, and fits the goofy yet meaty yarns spun by Kirkman.

so, hero or not?


that opinion might not be shared by his DC counterpart ...
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issues read: #1-3


The All New Atom
Gail Simone/John Byrne/Eddy Barrows/Ariel Olivetti/Trevor Scott
DC


bouncing off the events in the Identity Crisis storyline, it's impossible to think of the DC universe without its bite-sized hero. given how things ended, it was difficult to bring the character back without a really good explanation. the best solution is to break in a new Atom.

backstory #2: Ray Palmer has always been the Atom since 1961 (that would put him in his late 60's now but comic time doesn't work that way). an Ivy League professor, an integral member of the Justice League and probably the smartest man in this universe (don't tell Batman. or Luthor. or Deathstroke. or Vandal Savage.), Ray was the geek whose heroic fantasies came true. but with a heavy price: his wife, Jean Loring, went off the deep end and set off catastrophic events that made Ray so ashamed he literally ... disappeared.

enter, FOB (from HK) ... Ryan Choi.


a Palmer protege, Ryan arrives to take over Ray's seat in Ivy University. despite misgivings by the much older dean, he acknowledges that the young Dr. Choi has been personally endorsed by Ray prior to these events.


with Ray's apparent blessing (off panel) and clues provided in his office, Ryan finds one of his bio-belts, the device that gives Ray his superpowers.


despite being a fish out of water in his new American surroundings, Ryan quickly makes fast friends with the Lighter Than Air Society (LTAS), a collection of academic oddballs/geniuses who hold Ray in high regard. one of them, Dr. 'Panda' Potter, instantly becomes his university guide and best friend.


familiar with Ray's superhero career, the LTAS wholeheartedly support Ryan's ascension to the position, impressed with his smarts and quick-thinking.

... fashion-challenged?

aside from playing poker and trading scientific gobbledygook with his new pals, Ryan finds time to play with furry creatures ...

Ryan thought he was joining the Rat Patrol

... refining his bag of parlor tricks ...

"geez, Ryan ... we just told you: shrink before you fart!"

... and stimulating the female population.



the troubles start when weird things happen in Ivy Town, starting with the mysterious murder of Ryan's interim predecessor Professor Katz ... by dogs? an itinerant seems to have knowledge of the "beast below us", and then disappears.

here Gail Simone's (Birds of Prey) plot gets a little fuzzy. we have two warring factions: the Waiting, which are forces of Science ...

are you sure they didn't come from China too?

... and M'Nagalah, the "Cancer God", which seems to be on the side of one of Superman's weaknesses - magic (you know the answer wasn't kryptonite, Lois Lane, or shaving cream, right? right?).


this bizarre cast seem to be battling for the support of Ryan, as the Atom, although their respective presence in the town is as yet unexplained. The Waiting, for example, seems to reside in the fur of the dogs and ultimately have the Justice League in their sights.

you know Ryan digs that shit ... he's Asian!

to make things worse, another mysterious villain has recruited a serial killer/poet to make the new Atom's life miserable. or at least to be on "their" side in "the coming war". and they have a bio-belt too.


the worst part is: his first date (turns out to be Giganta) swallows him (okay, that didn't come out right. okay, shutting up now.). infected by the M'Nagalah, she ingests Ryan, and he has to play a little tummy pinball to escape.


this sequence should make you stop dating. seriously.

while we're here, let's throw in a couple more comedic scenes.

umm, i'll take "udders for lengthy viewing" for $500, Alex.


"damn! repeat after me: shrinking after the eat-all-you-can buffet is bad!"

question: given his dork background (and despite some martial arts training back in Hong Kong), when did Ryan suddenly become the second coming of Dick Grayson, original acrobatic sidekick to the Batman?

feet, meet face

in the meantime, Ryan's dorkier pals have invented a time-travelling device, based on his specs and an alien device he lifted from the Waiting.

this better be as exciting as the Bang Bus

issue #4 (drawn by Eddy Barrows, whom i prefer compared to increasingly-shoddy work of the legendary John Byrne) leaves us hanging with the dean wanting Ryan to leave, because Ray Palmer's legacy has come again full circle, and he prefers Ryan alive than dead. we also see the serial killer, properly known as Dwarfstar, skulking in the shadows and planning more misdeeds. given all these things stacked against you, you'd throw in the trowel. but some people like Ryan, after tasting the rush of adrenaline and superheroics (despite his doubts), can't. means i gotta follow suit.

what he said.
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issues read: #1-4