Sunday, February 28, 2010

Saturday, February 27, 2010

snaps: Fantastic Four #576

... where we meet the representatives of water, whereas last week we met the denizens of the deep earth. waaaaaaaaait a minute, i see where you're going here, Jon Hickman! so you are telling me, that the three races of old as created by those smug Celestials were not Eternals, Deviants and humans? geddouddaheah!!

Johnny Storm ... loves the winter.

yes, yes ... you forgot making blockbuster movies!!!

Sue confessing to having an affair with a student, in front of students.

this is the Man vs. Wild episode we weren't supposed to see.

male chauvinist pigs all over the world suddenly collapsed from simultaneous heart attacks.

Friday, February 26, 2010

snaps: Ms. Marvel #50

... where we say goodbye to Carol's almost 4 year series run, by celebrating with a punch up with the original Captain Mar-vell. ok, no its not the original joe, but the 96th one. heh. and ends up with the requisite "where do i go from here" talk with casual date Spider-Man. and she ends up morphing into an exotic Latina/Black chick. hey, is that still Mystique??

shouldn't Mystique be dead by now?

whoa! green puke alert!!

explosions galore and not a costume rip. don't give me that Reed Richards unstable molecule crap.

the only explanation is that Mystique replaced her. gimme my No-Prize!!

why the hell do i bother to hope?!

of course, Osborn is NOT going to be killed by Daken. there's Siege! and who knows if Osborn is going to be killed at all!

Dark Wolverine #83

Thursday, February 25, 2010

with feeling

drive-by readings

Scalped #35 (Vertigo/DC)
"Listening to the Earth Turn"
Jason Aaron
Danijel Zezelj
Guilia Brusco
Steve Wands
Jock (cover)

haven't read much this week, but for sheer emotional drive, this is hands-down my best book so far. taking a break from the action and backstabbing, but not taking the gas off the heartbreaking. Danijel Zezelj's bleak landscapes and tone fit the story of Mance and Hazel Boaz, hardy survivors of the Dakota Badlands, who are undergoing a grueling winter, tending their meager crops, and identifying Air Force jets from the sound of the engines as they lie in bed at night. food is scarce, and the biggest challenge is to drive into town and ask for supplies from the Assistance Center. it certainly takes a lot of guts to swallow your pride and accept the fact that some things are beyond your control. Mance though, maintains a modicum of pride by only accepting less than what's being offered. but the winter isn't done with them yet. Hazel's taken sick so they drive into town for medicine. this turns out to be a blessing in disguise, as a wayward jet crashes into their house. but their indomitable spirit gets them through, and out of disaster, hope springs eternal. this issue put a lump in my throat, as i can easily put myself in their shoes. i may be a big fan of the superhero genre, but its comics like these that justify me staying a fan.

Deadpool, spiders and monkeys, oh my!

with the arrival of Hitman Monkey on the scene, the Marvel Universe is about to be turned upside down. well, at least for Spidey and Deadpool.

in a nutshell, if you missed the simian assassin's origin, suffice it to say he learned from a great killer. combine with natural monkey agility and survival skills, you probably have one of the better assassins in history. and now he's out to wipe out the competition. hey, Wade, look out!!

if this isn't made into a movie, i'm going to stage a protest march. ok, can we have him at least in the 3rd Spider-Man movie after the reboot? or in the Deadpool solo film?

Deadpool #20

new Olympic sport: mouse throwing

Batman & Robin #9

Monday, February 22, 2010

you hit like a girl #20

hell, why not make it a three for three?

if you look closely, Kara has her eyes open. and she's slightly smiling. i'd say she's checking out the package, but that's just me.

Magog #6

and now, a word from the Batcave

BATMAN: last week, Tiger Woods called a staged press conference. He apologized like a robot. He's not sincere. He wants his cake and eat it too.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

hey Alison, KISS needs their makeup back.

you know what, she's the best choice to replace Simon Cowell on American Idol next season!

snaps: Captain America #603

... where we find our intrepid Cap & Falcon pairing (Sam must feel reaaaaally old) run headlong into a trap set by Bad Cap of the '50s. wow, that old geezer effed you up good, didn't he? are you gonna let him get away with that, Buck? are ya?

Batman and Robin did this all the time, and the Internet giggled.

so that's what he did after retiring from editing Captain America!

i didn't know The Shocker could fly ... or was black.

"hey Buck, Steve told me Natasha's been around the block a few times ..."

ok, let's try to figure out what they said ... is it "nagger"?

"no, this symbolizes America punching the black man in the face!"

excellent work as usual from Mr. Brubaker.

aaaaaaaaaaand ... she's back.

what i want to know is, how long was she out there without any food or water.

'nuff said!

Uncanny X-Men #521

Saturday, February 20, 2010

snaps: Justice League of America #42

... where we take up James Robinson on his tweet the other day:

Whatever hater goes nuts on me for JLA 42, God bless you. But I love the color from Pete Pantazis. The use of refined color in flashbacks brought me great enjoyment. A very talented fellow.

hey, am not a hater. i just try to poke fun at what i read. you, sir, on the other hand, chop off characters' arms just for the heck of it.

and oh, the ego.

oh wait, that was Donna talking ...

he-hey! don't these guys look familiar? Dr. Impossible? Hunter? a moron on a Chair? Neon Black? big athletic woman with a mace?

i think you should throw in "unhackable" in there, Cyborg. because i have one word for you: Amazo.

do you really tell anybody they're "going to die"? and ask them if they heard you?

you'd think after all this time, the Watchtower would be more secure.

oh hey! look who's going a trip down memory lane. specifically, JLA #8-9, Aug/Sept. 1997, back when a comic book still cost less than 2 bucks.

Connor Hawke survived that time. the last archer on the roster almost didn't. i almost expect Robinson to do something very, very bad to Ollie.

but hey, Pete Pantazis' colors are so awesome!

Friday, February 19, 2010

snaps: Power Girl #9

... where Palmiotti, Gray and Conner had me at "stupid American policemen." no, wait - it was right in the opening scene with PeeGee showering. oh hell, just read the thing - its a blast!

Jimmy Olsen a peeping Tom! who knew???

every woman should have this power. i mean, really.

careful, you pervs. your next victim might be ... Power Girl.

does Richard Starkings know about this?


the abyss gazed back

drive-by readings

Punisher #14 (Marvel)
Rick Remender
Dan Brereton
Tony Moore
Dan Brown
Joe Caramagna
Mike McKone/Morry Hollowell (cover)

hey, did i miss something? suddenly Frank's computer geek friend is back on the scene. no, i don't mean Micro. anyhoo, Henry's magic touch with the keyboard and the internet (and his librarian-schmoozing skills probably) serves them well as we find out who the boss of these monster hunters are. turns out its one Robert Hellsgaard (that figures!), monster victim circa 1898 and unfairly imprisoned for mercy killing. defeated by Dracula himself and sent to Limbo, now he's managed to beat time inside an armor of his own design (hey, Tony Stark, sounds like something you'd be interested in - if you haven't invented it already). brought back by monster-obsessed Japs (yay, shall we see the origins of tentacle sex here too?), Hellsgaard becomes too much of a guiding light and they expanded their scopt to include anyone doesn't look human (probably except shapeshifters, whom they can't detect). which brings us to the here and now. and oh, that Bloodstone thing? that may be the only thing that would extend Hellsgaard's life. and now, Frank's ready to take it back. by the way, this may be the only book that uses the term "technological viagra". bravo, Mr. Remender.

snaps: Doomwar #1

... where we see a much sensible powerplay unfold as compared to invading a mythical kingdom over Oklahoma. Doomwar plays second banana to Siege, but Dr. Doom takes a backseat to no one, even as he's been cast out of Norman Osborn's Cabal. Doom's messing with the Asgardians was part of Loki's machinations, as much as Siege is. failing that (and he had these things in play much much earlier), Doom concentrates on taking the vibranium from Wakanda, which despite a highly tech-savvy country is one of the most unstable as all Black Panther stories (go ahead, check 'em) have T'Challa dealing with coup d'etats and invasions in one form or another. oh, and right now, he's gone to ask the X-Men for help to rescue his bride and take his homeland back.

what do you mean, "mutant peoples"??

oh, oh! you wanna play it that way, Mister High and Mighty Cause He Got Hissown Island?

rumor has it that Latveria used to be a Confederate state ...

why does it look like they're headed for the beach? and it looks like Logan's gonna scoooooooore!

oooohhhh Shuri! your father, Tom Cruise, won't like that!

Thursday, February 18, 2010

turning Japanese

drive-by readings

Daredevil #505 (Marvel)
"Left Hand Path"
Andy Diggle
Antony Johnston
Marco Checchetto
Matt Hollingsworth
Joe Caramagna
Paolo Rivera (cover)

who wants to be the new Wolverine? well, who else but our newest Hand Puppet Master, Matt Murdock. in his quest to turn The Hand into a force of justice (easier said than done), Matt is building bigger prisons and doing networking stuff to get them to follow his lead. whereas Wolverine pretty much chased skirts, drank beer and brawled like a drunken sailor, Matt wants to effect change. i'm just not sure how long this'll last and then we get the next writer having Matt ruminating on his past life as an 'enlightened organized crime boss' and admits to biting off more than he can chew. especially when these Japs find out he really didn't whack Master Izo.
despite Matt's noble intentions, he's not going blindly (we hope), as we see other sinister plans are afoot and not just with the obvious antagonist in front of him, the South American daimyo named Bakuto. its one thing to have Danny Rand walking around K'un L'un because he practically grew up there; white guy Matt addressing all these ninjas and samurais right in their own turf seems a little off. good thing they're more or less subservient to tradition, until of course, that opportune moment when they can stick a knife in your back. its fun to explore this new territory left behind by Ed Brubaker, although i can't wait for Matt to get back Stateside and deal with the aftermath of Siege and the re-ascension of his superhero friends.

and ..... he's dead.

and this is why it takes too long for the X-Men to eliminate their enemies. longtime loser and '90s hair model/spoiled brat Matsu'o Tsurayaba finally bites the dust, way past his expiry date. and to think Wolverine doesn't want him dead and tortures him every single year for killing his wife Mariko. huh - really?? i didn't see him in this state when he was hassling our mutants back in the '90s. so Wolverine only thought about it thereafter, like when Matsu'o went from B-list to D-list?

same day every year? really? what about that time when he actually became a Hand assassin?

apparently, this is the alternate ending of Edward vs Bella, The Twilight Chronicles

c'mon, Matsu'o, say the "z". you're almost there. Utz! Utz!

Psylocke #4