Frank Miller/Lynn Varley
Dark Horse
i've been planning this blog for months, and i knew what i wanted as its first official subject: yes, you, Mr. Frank Miller. i'm sorry i haven't purchased Sin City yet (yes, the legit official DVD, no AVI rip for me on that one). but i will. you bet i will. in the meantime, i'd like to feature your one work that i really wanted to read for years (why haven't i before? economics, Mr. Miller). i have The Dark Knight Returns of course, and because of that, i also bought The Dark Knight Strikes Again (not your best work, obviously). and with that, i became really excited when 300 fell into my hands.
for those unfamiliar with the phrase 'Go, Tell the Spartans ...', this book is your front-row seat to the answer (no, not Allen Iverson, idiot). ancient Greece in 480 BC was a cluster of city states then, and were under threat of invasion from the Persians led by the world-beater Xerxes. to repel them, King Leonidas of Sparta leads a contingent of 300 of his finest Spartan soldiers to allow the main Greek force to retreat and regroup. eventually, Xerxes gave up on his plan to conquer Greece, and Thermopylae was the turning point.
Leonidas though, had an extra 700 Thespians to help out ... no, these were not actors from the local drama theatre but soldiers from the city of Thespiae ... oh, just read it yourself. Leonidas and his loyalists died fighting off the Persians in what is now known as the Battle of Thermopylae. in their honor, the poet Simonides wrote the famous epigram, which may have different translations, but forever a fitting epitaph to the courage and bravery of those who died that day.
- Ὦ ξεῖν’, ἀγγέλλειν Λακεδαιμονίοις ὅτι τῇδε
- κείμεθα, τοῖς κείνων ῥήμασι πειθόμενοι.
- Ō xein', angellein Lakedaimoniois hoti tēde
- keimetha tois keinōn rhēmasi peithomenoi.
the battle will be always be a highlight of military history, and why not? this is where macho words are backed up with deed. consider the threat uttered by one of Xerxes' lieutenants, warning that the Spartans "will not be slaves", because they "will be dead by noon the next day" and their (Persians) "arrows will blot out the sun" - and witness the laconic reply:
this is now one of the enduring mottoes of the Greek/Hellenic Army.
by Frank Miller's account (hehe), Leonidas himself caused this situation by not lying down and getting rolled over by the first Persian emissaries who "requested" them to do just that. to compound that, the (dirty old) priests whom the King had to reluctantly consult for his next move, were in collusion with the Persians, and they had decreed (based on what their oracle said - you'll know why they're old and dirty), either Sparta will lie in ruins, or a King has to sacrifice himself for her. being the honorable macho that Leonidas was, he knew where his destiny lay.
among the interesting points were the fact that there were about 2 million Persians in the invading force. even factoring in the 700 actors, i mean, Thespians, that's still a staggering ratio of 2,000 to 1. who beats odds like that? but the lesson here is, never quote the odds to the Spartans.
this part seems to be a slight change-up to the historical event where Xerxes tells them to surrender their arms, and Leonidas' famous retort to that.
in the battle, Leonidas and his men acquit themselves well, blunting wave after wave of Persians, including Xerxes' elite warriors, the Immortals (aren't you excited yet?). Xerxes, represented here as a bling-blinged cross between Yul Brynner and Grace Jones, actually ponders the idea of losing to this scantily-clad, bare-footed king. during one of the breaks in the fighting, Xerxes opens a dialogue with Leonidas, as tastefully translated by Miller:
Leonidas: "Don't lose sleep over us. We're having the time of our lives."
Xerxes: "Brave words, Spartan. Yours is a fascinating tribe. There is much our cultures could share."
Leonidas: "We've been sharing our culture with you all morning."
actually, Leonidas could have won the day (and return to his smoking hot wife), if not for the actions of a traitor, Ephialtes, a grossly-disfigured Spartan who wanted to join Leonidas' army in hopes of redeeming his father's name.
i don't know if we can blame Leonidas for that, but the man is hardcore. when he says jump, you jump. when he says stop, you should (or else he'll skewer you). if he says he can't find a use for you, just suck it up and go home. but in Ephialtes' case, he even fails in his suicide attempt and joins the other side, and leads the Persians through a little-known path through the mountains to encircle the doomed Spartans.
the last issue, showcasing the defeat of the Spartans, is definitely one for the ages. that i will leave to you to read about. i dare you not be touched. i don't care how macho you are. Miller and Varley weave a tale so poignant and so hardcore.
the whole thing was tailor-made to be a Hollywood movie (Mel Gibson was busy drinking, badmouthing Jews and re-editing Apocalypto when they called) ... and what do you know? they are making one. helmed (currently, and co-written too) by Dawn of the Dead director Zack Snyder, reportedly they will remain true to Miller's adaptation. that's good news. at least Snyder knows how to work with crowds, although this one's a larger scope than marauding zombies. Gerard Butler has played a Germanic warrior of epics, a scarred broken-hearted phantom, a scourge of God, a vampire, and now, dons the helmet of Leonidas. get your $10 ready. don't screw this up, Snyder!
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issues read #1-5
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